So after a year or so of deciding that I was going to become the best vegan there ever was I stopped. It was as simple as that. It was equivalent to slapping myself on the face several times and giving myself a good talking to. And in giving myself that very good talking to, I looked at a lot more then just the hell I was putting myself through with becoming a vegan goddess. I was actually dealing with my wellness lifestyle in the same way I had dealt with most of my life. Like an anal obsessive maniac. I had to stop buying the books, looking at gorgeous vegans who made amazing things with ingredients I could not find. I had to stop looking for something that I could not achieve, I hate to admit to myself that I hated kale. I had to look at why I was doing this. Because it was my best option for a long and fruitful life. That was it. Then I looked a few other things.
I looked at the fact that I sometimes could not get off the computer even though I had two gorgeous twins who were dying to play a game. The problem with working from home is that there is no official knocking off time, but you know what, work could wait. I had started taking daily pictures of the beautiful area I lived in for work, I stopped looking it as work, and realised it was like a gift that every morning you spent some time looking for something beautiful. The more I looked around me, the more I fell in love with the beautiful area of the world I lived in.
I can remember one day I was hungry and literally could not be bothered to make a vegan super meal and all I had in the fridge was some tomatoes. So I cut them in half, liberally sprinkled them with salt and took them outside to sit in the sun with my dogs. I was not remotely interested or excited in what I was about to eat. I actually sat there with Kevin the Koolie and Rosie the Koolie Cross and forgot about everything for a while. I was having a day when the word tired made me laugh. I wished I could be just tired rather than exhausted. Fatigue was my constant enemy at the time. When I finally bit into those sun warmed tomatoes it was like a revelation. There was the flavour I had been looking for. That was the sort of taste that made me want to cry with sheer contentment. They were amazing. They tasted so bloody good. Then I thought stuff it, work can wait and I lay on the grass in my backyard and fell asleep in the sun.
In that instant I had all the colour, taste, flavour and love that I needed. I knew then it was about going back to basics.
All because of a beautiful tomato.